yes, he was thirteen… and barely five feet tall.

BUT he had a nasty mouth, calling mean names like “queer”,”faggot”, “big butt” and “chicken legs” AFTER the nice ferris*/cole kids INCLUDED him and his friends in their game!

after waiting to see how the kids handled it (jules kept telling everyone “just ignore him”) i turned to observe/glare at him and caught him splashing and name calling the girls!

oh, no he didn’t!

so i pointed at him and giving him my best claire huxtable look,  said:

“hey you, bully! you’re out of here! go! if you’re not nice you don’t get to play with nice kids!” he tried to interrupt but i was on a roll “go! you’re a mean bully, you can’t play! i will look up your name and call your mother!”

(thank god he was still young enough that a call home was frightening)

he swam off and we didn’t see him the rest of the afternoon… though i did have the pleasure of having to explain to a group of tweens what “faggot” and “queer” meant. i hope i have the pleasure of running into his mother, she must be so proud!

*family i nanny for

i just finished writing an email in which i misspelled “necessary”.

words i spelled correctly in the same email:

luxurious, glamourous, Le Creuset, chenin blanc

me: so i’m on the guestlist for that party you’re working saturday

jess: really?? what is it for?

me: oh… ummm…uh, my neighbors first communion

these two pretty much sum it all up:

i think this goes without saying…

that mouse surely has add/adhd

yes, it’s the very same alexander who had a terribe, horrible, no good, very bad day